Thursday, September 22, 2005


I will be in Sydney soon!!!!!!!!! Sunday morning!!!!!!!!!!!! Woohoo!!!

If you can't all tell by now, I'm rather excited. I think I started getting very excited last night when it hit me that I will be spending all of next week in the Big Smoke!! Hurrah!!!

I will also be graduating at long last on Tuesday the 27th!!! I'm going to chuck my hat up in the air and I don't care if it falls on the ground and gets muddy................I'll do it anyway and then steal someone else's hat and give them my cruddy one!! Hehe. I am also looking foward to going to Canberra and tiptoeing through the tulips at Floriade. Hopefully Kasun will pick me some flowers and present them to me...............(this is a hint for you Kasun, if you are reading this!!).

Hmmm..........what else. I am going to be busy tomorrow so that's good, time will fly. I will be going to Sashani's birthday party tomorrow (an all you can eat seafood restaraunt..........they better have other stuff). I will be walking in our cancer Relay For Life tonight and perhaps tomorrow morning, so I will be a bit tired and will sleep on the plane.

I ALSO NEED TO PACK!!! Still haven't done that yet.

I have a joke for you, it's pretty pathetic/funny so I hope you enjoy it!!!

Q. What do you call an adolescent rabbit??

A. A pubic hare.

Hehe, that's courtesy of my cousin in Perth (Tammi). Her sense of humour is worse than mine.

Take care and I'll see my buddies in Sydney soon!!!

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: If I lived back in the wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like "Hey, look. He's carrying a soldering iron!" and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, "That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice." Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they had made fun of the soldering iron of justice, and I could probably hit them up for a free drink.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Just Call It Disorganisation........

Well, I'm sure you are all aware of the fact that I'll soon be heading off to Sydney. How soon is a rather ambiguous fact..........see, I was certain that I would be arriving on Monday the 26th Sept in the morning. However, last night as I was finalising the bookings of accommodation around various sites in Sydney, I decided to have a look once more at my e-ticket.

It clearly read: Departing Darwin Sunday 25th Sept 1:30 am. Arriving Sydney Sunday 25th Sept 6:05 am.


So, infact, I'm leaving on Saturday night, not Sunday night, and I'm arriving in Sydney a whole day earlier than what I've been telling every body!!! Oh well, at least I'll get to see certain people sooner!! Yay!!

However, my Dad was like, 'what are we going to do about the accommodation??' So I rang up the Travelodge and booked in an extra day without drama.

However, my Mum was quick to point out that this was the second time I'd stuffed up the booking of tickets/accommodation. The first time was when I made a booking for them to come to Sydney last year and got confused about what day they wanted to arrive and booked it too early.............. I swear this whole red eye flight thing has kept me on my toes. Me being the good daughter that I am said 'yeah yeah, it's all my fault' and promptly went to bed.

I mean, how come it seems as if I'm the only organising this trip?? They are going along with me.............couldn't they do some ringing around instead of getting annoyed at me for getting the bookings wrong!!!! My Dad acknowledged this.............which I was happy about.

I'm starting to get excited about going now, only 9 days to go (instead of the original 10..........).

See you guys really soon!!!! Have a great day!!

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: If you're a horse, and someone gets on you, and falls off, and then gets right back on you, I think you should buck him off right away.

Monday, September 05, 2005

50 Ways To Freak Out Your Roommate

Hey Guys,

I know I'm kinda plagiarising here, but I thought I would share with you one of my all time favourite lists.


50 Ways To Freak Out Your Roommate:

1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave"Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach everytime your roommate walks in. If he/she asks about the wrappers, say you know nothing about them.

2. Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors by your bed. Snicker at your roommate every morning.

3. Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying,"Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

4. Trash the room when your roommate's not around. Then leave and wait for your roommate to come back. When he/she does, walk in and act surprised. Say, "Uh-oh, it looks like THEY were here again."

5. Every time you see your roommate yell, "You son of a..." and kick him/her in the stomach.Then buy him/her some ice cream.

6. Set your roommate's bed on fire. Apologize and explain that you've been watching too much"Beavis & Butthead." Do it again. Tell him/her that you're not sorry because this time, they deserved it.

7. Put your glasses on before you go to bed. Take them off as soon as you wake up. If your roommate asks, explain that they are Magic Dream Glasses. Complain that you've been having terrible nightmares.

8. Eat lots of "Lucky Charms." Pick out all the yellow moons and stockpile them in the closet. If your roommate inquires, explain that visitors are coming, but you can't say anything more, or you'll have to face the consequences.

9. Set up meetings with your roommate's faculty advisor. Inquire about his/her academic potential. Take lots of notes, and then give your roommate a full report. Insist that he/she do the same.

10. "Drink" a raw egg for breakfast every morning. Explain that you are in training. Eat a dozen donuts every night.

11. Every Thursday, pack up everything you own and tell your roommate you're going home. Come back in an hour and explain that no one was home. Unpack everything and go to sleep.

12. Every time you wake up, start yelling, "Oh, my God! Where the hell am I?!" and run around the room for a few minutes. Then go back to bed. If your roommate asks, say you don't know what he/she is talking about.

13. Draw a tiny, black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "It's spreading, it's spreading."

14. Buy a McDonald's "Happy Meal" for lunch every day. Eat the straw and the napkin. Throw everything else away.

15. Buy a plant. Sleep with it at night. Talk to it. After a few weeks, start to argue with it loudly. Then yell, "I can't live in the same room with you," storm out of the room and slam the door. Get rid of the plant, but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant ever again.

16. Buy a Jack-In-The-Box. Every day, turn the handle until the clown pops out. Scream continuously for twenty minutes.

17. Hang up pictures of chickens all over the room. If your roommate eats eggs, yell at him/her and call him/her a cannibal.

18. Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon...."

19. Lock the door while your roommate is out. When he/she comes back and tries to unlock it, yell, "Don't come in, I'm naked!" Keep this up for several hours. When you finally let your roommate in, immediately take off all of your clothes, and ignore your roommate.

20. Bring in potential "new" roommates from around campus. Give them tours of the room and the building. Have them ask about your roommate in front of him/her, and reply, "Oh,him/her? He/she won't be here much longer."

21. If your roommate comes home after midnight, hit him/her on the head with a rolling pin. Immediately go to bed, muttering, "Ungrateful little..."

22. Pile dirty dishes in your roommate's bed. Insist that you don't know how they got there.

23. Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

24. Feign a serious illness for two weeks. Have a priest come to your room and visit you. Write out a will, leaving everything to your roommate. One day, miraculously "recover." Insist that your roommate write out a will, leaving everything to you. Every time he/she coughs, excitedly say, "Oooh, are you dying?"

25. Live in the hallway for a month. Afterwards, bring all of your stuff back into the room and tell your roommate, "Okay, your turn."

26. Keep a tarantula in a jar for three days. Then get rid of the tarantula. If your roommate asks, say, "Oh, he's around here somewhere."

27. Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

28. Bowl inside the room. Set up tournaments with other people in the building. Award someone a trophy. If your roommate wants to bowl too, explain that he/she needs bowling shoes.

29. Walk backwards all the time. Then pretend to trip and hurt yourself. Fake an injury and go through a long, painful recovery. Start walking backwards again.

30. While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

31. Explain to your roommate that you're going to be housing a prospective student in the near future. One day, bring in a pig. If your roommate protests, hug the pig and tell your roommate that he/she hurt its feelings. Watch T.V with the pig, eating lots of bacon.

32. Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the hell is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.

33. Punch a hole in the T.V. Sit and watch it anyway, complaining about the poor picture quality.

34. Wear a cape. Stand in front of an open window for about an hour every day. Then, one day,when your roommate is gone, go outside and lie down underneath the window, pretending to be hurt, and wait for your roommate to return. The next day, start standing in front of the window again.

35. Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."

36. Fill an empty shaving cream can with whipped cream. Use it to shave, and then spray someinto your mouth. Later on, complain that you feel sick. Continue this process for several weeks.

37. Cover your bed with a tent. Live inside it for a week. If your roommate asks, explain that "It's a jungle out there." Get your roommate to bring you food and water.

38. Keep a vacuum cleaner in the middle of the room. Look at it with fear for a few days. Then stay out of the room entirely, opening the door only a crack and whispering to your roommate, "Psst! Is it gone?"

39. Break the window with a rock. If your roommate protests, explain that you were hot. Open and close the broken window as you normally would.

40. Throw darts at a bare wall. All of a sudden, act excited, telling your roommate that you hit the bull's eye.

41. Send flowers to your roommate, with a card that says, "I'm sorry. It won't happen again. "When you see them, start ripping up the flowers. Repeat the process for a few weeks.

42. Call your roommate "Clyde" by accident. Start doing so every so often. Increase the frequency over the next few weeks, until you are calling him "Clyde" all the time. If your roommate protests, say, "I'm sorry. I won't do that anymore, Murray."

43. Hire a night watchman to guard the room while you are sleeping.

44. Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an elephant weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.

45. Practice needlepoint every night. At one point, grab your thumb and scream, "Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!" Cry hysterically for a few minutes, and then go to bed. Sob and sniff all night.

46. When your roommate comes in, pretend that you are on the phone, screaming angrily and shouting obscenities. After you hang up, say, "That was your mom. She said she'd call back."

47. Every time your roommate comes in, immediately turn off the lights and go to bed. When he/she leaves, get up and loudly yell, "Okay, guys, you can come out now."

48. Start wearing a crown, all the time. If your roommate tells you to take it off, say, "What the hell do you think you are? A king?"

49. Sit in front of a chess board for hours, saying nothing, doing nothing. Then, look up and say,"I think this game goes a lot faster with two players."

50. Talk back to your "Rice Krispies." All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floorand kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

Hehe, okay, so I hope that entertained you. For those who have seen the list before, I'm sorry, but please feel free to re-live the memories!!!

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: To me, boxing is like ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

How Embarrassment!!!!

Okay, so on Wednesday I had to perform at the launch of the National Youth Awards in Darwin. Not just me by myself, but me and the other girls in my dance class, you know what I mean!! So, as you do, we decided we would do the Can Can, coz we are just SO good at it you know. After a few days of practice, and remembering the routine we were ready to rumble!!! When we got to the venue, we saw how small the stage was and were thankful that there was only four of us in the routine (there was NO way more of us could have been on there!!). After a few quick run throughs, we were all good..............or so we thought!!!

We then went backstage and finalised our costumes/makeup and kept warming up and practicing lifts and things like that. We were supposed to be on at 10.27am (exactly). We were all so used to waiting around to go on stage that I was surprised that we would be on at such a time. My dance teacher was in the bathroom when we heard a frantic "You're on NOW!"

The three of us were like "what??"

"YOU"RE ON NOW!!!!!!!!!"

3 of us: "SHAUNA!!"

We couldn't find where she was, so one girl and myself went out on stage only to realise that the music had already started playing................we decided to just stand there and ruffle our skirts about and smile. Then Shauna and Madeline came up on stage and by that time, the music was halfway through the dance and none of us knew what part we were up to. We tried to do a few kicks and I tried to follow what Shauna was doing, but alas, it was unsuccessful. I looked at Madeline and she looked at me and we both had that look in your eyes that said "this is a joke!!"

Shauna realised we couldn't keep stuffing around and in fact, the audience were actually laughing at us, so she was like "Cut, we have to start again!!"

Then she was like "sorry, I was in the bathroom............" This created more laughter from the audience.

We then did the dance again, pretty well I must say for people who had just recently suffered severe embarrassment. Though there was this one woman in the audience who kept cracking up the whole time, so I don't know whether that was a good thing.

We were also on the news for two seconds (our stuff up was not though!!).

Well, that is my most recent embarrassing story, I'm glad I could share it with you!!!

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: We used to laught at Grandpa when he'd head off and go fishing. But we wouldn't be laughing that evening when he'd come back with some whore he picked up in town.