Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Tourist Season

Due to the fact that Darwin is so beautiful these days, we are having a lot of tourists coming over here. It's weird how you can spot a tourist a mile off. Perhaps it is their pasty white skin (these are usually the European tourists - mainly from England), or maybe the fact that they are the only people remotely interested in the many souvenier shops in Darwin. I remember being able to spot an American exchange student a mile away, probably because I could hear them, but if they weren't talking, it was due to the way they walked. I also remember at uni thinking I was able to tell the difference between Sri Lankans and Indians, but I was wrong at times (this has nothing to do with tourists, but I thought I'd just chuck it in there).

I have decided to compile a list of how to spot a tourist, so that if you see one, you can say "g'day mate, want to chuck another shrimp on the barbie?!?"

Traits of the Tourist:
  • The cool digital camera so small, it would fit in your pocket (if you decided to steal it)
  • The caps with FLAT peaks
  • Bumbags or money pouches hanging around their waists
  • Wearing socks with thongs (this usually happens in Canberra)
  • The confused looks and frequent looking up to the sky (I don't know why they do this, but I probably did it in Sydney too)
  • The facination with plaques scattered about the place
  • Trying to save money on food by shopping at Woolies
  • The longish denim shorts (these are especially popular with older American ladies)
  • The VERY short denim shorts (these are especially popular with younger American ladies)
  • The facination with koalas and kangaroos (get over it guys, we eat these animals - just not the koalas)
  • The trademark wooden beaded necklaces (these are popular amongst the younger men, even local Darwin guys have been known to wear these to appear more attractive to the ladies)
  • The 'chinos' worn by guys in clubs (remember, it's Darwin, stubbies all the way here!!)

Okay, that's the most comprehensive list on how to spot tourists. I would appreciate it if you would add more to the list in the comments section.

We need to be 'aware, and not alarmed' by these people.

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: Any man, in the right situation, is capable of murder. But not any man is capable of being a good camper. So, murder and camping are not as similar as you might think.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

How Excitement!!!!

Ha ha!!!! Only 18 days until I'm in SYDNEY!!!!!! Can I have a simultaneous 'Woohoo'?? Thank you people (I know at least one of you said it!!!). Now, I'm getting rather excited about seeing the place again. Sydney became a huge part of my life and ofcourse I didn't realise it until I moved back to Darwin. I wouldn't say I like Sydney more than Darwin, but I will say that both cities (yes, Darwin is a city) hold very special places in my heart.

I have no real liking of flying, but I can't wait to get on that plane and sleep (hopefully) and then wake up when there is only 10 minutes until we land. I'll then wipe the sleep from my eyes and drool off my chin, scrape my hair back into something known as presentable and try not to imagine myself getting off the plane and running into someone's arms, because if I do, I'll probably push everyone who is in front of me out of the way and disembark from the aircraft in an unorderly way. It's tempting though.

I need to take a deep breath and relax, but I can't and I know I'm going to get more and more excited as the days draw closer and closer...............

I can't wait to see my long lost buddies who will come from far and wide to meet me.....YAY!!!!! Thanks for your emails, messages, and phone calls and for just keeping in touch!!!! I suffered a while when I first came back due to you all not being here, thanks for making me feel missed (you don't know how much I appreciate that!!).

Hmmm.......what else?? This is turning into an insane rambling.........

Oh, I don't know...........

Hey, here's a joke:
Q. What's black and white and red all over??
A. A Newspaper!!!

Now there's one to tell your friends..............

See you later!!!

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: A wise man can pick up a grain of sand and envision a whole universe. But the stupid man will just lay down on some seaweed and roll around until he is completely draped in it. Then he'll stand up and go "Hey, I'm Vine Man."

Friday, June 03, 2005


Yesterday during my lunch break I decided to go for a walk around town as I had eaten too much at morning tea. Yes, I still behave much like a starving College resident at places where copious amounts of food is just left on tables. By the time lunch time rolled around I felt like I could just roll around too. I wasn't hungry but needed to get out of the office.

So, during my walk I saw a baby possum bound down from a tree and run underneath a bench. I was facinated and bent down to have a closer look. It was adorable and I wanted to pat it. So I put my arm out and ofcourse it scampered away from me. After about a minute, it decided to go back under the bench and eat some food that had been left there. The bench was in the shade so I decided to sit down rather than stand in the sun and look rather ridiculous bending down looking at something that most people probably wouldn't be able to see if the drove past. I kept a close eye on the possum who kept running around but always came back to the area near the bench. I was scared it would get run over by a car, but it didn't cross the road, but stayed on the pavement. Everytime it came running back to near the bench it would come closer to my feet, then finally, it came so close it actually licked my toe!!! I think I must have moved slightly because I imagined it biting my toe and me having to get all sorts of injections afterwards, and it bounded off again.

Hehe, so, that was my experience with the Wildlife in Darwin yesterday.l

I also had an experience with another sort of Darwin Wildlife a few days ago. After coming back from doing the mail round for work. I was crossing the road and was confronted by a man who said in a VERY Australian accent: "Ah, another Sheila!!!" I wasn't sure if he was talking to me so I just kept walking towards him. He then asked me where I was from and told me his name was Dave and put his hand out as if to shake my hand. I didn't want to be a bad sport so I put my hand out too and he took it and kissed it!!! Hehe, I was shocked and walked off feeling VERY embarrassed.

Ah yes, there are many 'Wild' creatures in the NT.

Jack Handy Thought For The Day: At first I thought, if I were Superman, a perfect secret identity would be "Clark Kent, Dentist" because you could save money on tooth X-rays. But then I thought, if a patient said "How's my back tooth?" and you just looked at it with your X-ray vision and said, "Oh, it's okay", then the patient would probably say, "Aren't you going to take an X-ray, stupid?" and you'd say "Aw, screw you, get outta here," and then he probably wouldn't even pay his bill.